We had our first surfing lesson today. Jason, who could easily be a stand in for a Greek statue, picked us up and sped us off to what he called one of the world’s finest surfing beaches for beginners. A few land demonstrations, a safety talk, and we were off to the water. I’m still startled that ocean water can be warm as that’s NOT been my life experience of ocean water thus far. The first challenge was paddling our boards out past the break without getting a snozeful of water. Marian led off and got to standing and rode her first wave in like a pro. Me not so much… though I did get to standing. Jason playfully tried to get us to compete with each other but alas without much luck.
I was too busy trying to take all the metaphoric lessons from surfing for a strong life instead. I’m reading “Find Your Strongest Life” by Markus Buckingham right now and had read a chapter right before we headed out to surf. My mind must have been primed because I felt like I was totally understanding what I was reading by learning to surf. One of the points in today’s reading was “Your strengths are those activities that make you feel strong. Your weaknesses are what make you feel weak.” Out in the water, trying to sort through the all the steps to catching a wave, I realized that learning situations make me feel strong. I love learning new skills, new activities and new ideas. I feel so engaged and alive when I am curious and when I am trying to master something new.
Buckingham states that when we know what gives us strength, we can aim to have more of that in our lives and less of what steals it. Jason was coaching us in catching the right wave, one that wasn’t too big or steep or one that wasn’t worth the effort in trying to catch. Just like the middle way in Buddhism. Just like finding the right path up a mountain. Catching the right wave seemed an apt metaphor for life and all the choices we make. Though sometimes we don’t know if a wave was right until we’re into the process of riding it…today when a wave was too steep, the board nosedived and tossed me and the board into the air. Instant feedback. Not the right wave. Then there were the waves I put a bunch of effort into catching and then didn’t amount to much and either passed under the board or were underwhelming to ride. Then there were the ones, the perfect ones for me–just the right amount of challenge, speed, and willingness to be caught…ocean bliss, a smooth ride, a feeling of strength.
Like a motorcycle, the surf board will go where you are looking. If you are looking at other surfers, you’ll hit them. Same with the reef. You always need to look where you want to go. Markus was saying the same thing in his book. He said, “You will discover your strengths by looking closely at the strong moments in a regular week of your life.” Sometimes a friend or teacher can help us find the right wave. Jason was instrumental in that today. At first, he chose the waves we’d ride. Then, as the lesson progressed, he expected me to start making the call on which wave to ride. He wanted me to look over my shoulder at the coming wave, make the decision to ride it, and then look to where I wanted to go. All sage advice for surfing and for life.
My Buddhist teacher describes courage as “gentle bravery.” Learning new skills, especially physical ones, can require courage. You have to be willing to be a novice, make mistakes, feel incompetent, and be back in kindergarden or learning to walk all over again. Markus was also advocating gentleness with ourselves-especially in the face of setbacks or hard times. Having that compassion for ourselves keeps us in the game, keeps us taking small steps towards strength, and keeps us trying to catch the next wave even though we’re pretty sure we’ll miss it or we’ll fall off again. A favourite Japanese proverb comes to mind, “Fall down seven times, get up eight.”
Definitely fell down at least seven times today but the final ride into the beach was sweet and I’ll be looking forward to where I want to go, to my strongest possible life…which if I keep surfing is going to make me seriously strong in the upper body and core…because as Jason said today, “Surfing is 95% paddling, 4% waiting, and 1% riding the waves but that 1% makes it all worthwhile.”
Ya you betcha! Happy riding!



TA – I love your description and analogy to living a strong life. Thanks!
Thanks Jeri. It was a great surfing lesson as well as life lesson. We’re learning lots about how strong the sun was that day because both Marian and I got sunburned on the backs of our legs…so even more lessons about self-care 🙂